BY: ROSEANNE CARENZA
Here I am all alone.
I don’t know what to do.
In a whirlwind of pain.
Where do I go?
I haven’t a clue.
This is the “new” me now.
For it was this I was told.
How do I live now?
Wow! What a crappy life I was sold.
Please don’t think you are worthless, shamed, and, in despair.
I am here to guide you.
You have no need to be scared.
Okay, well you look like my brain.
With the cauliflower shape and, inside,
With the worm-like snakes.
But why are there red lights flashing on the left side for goodness sake’s?
This is the part of me that has been broken;
And cannot be made for the lights to turn green.
We need to work together, to become a team.
This is nonsense. You are speaking out of place!
You are my brain. You can FIX ME !
Let’s cut to the chase!
I really wish this was something I could do.
However, parts of me were broken,
And, I hoped so badly Roseanne, I could do this for you.
You lie! You are SMART!
You were born inside of me.
You know everything!!
And how to fix things!!
So do it now!
I don’t want to hear your nonsense!
Just FIX ME!
I don’t care how!!
This is not so.
I wish it could be.
If we work together.
We can find ways to agree.
Well, let me explain to you;
I can barely see out of my own two eyes;
I am sad, depressed, and, I always cry.
I get mad.
I throw my things way up in the air.
I yell, and, scream.
You know, I just don’t care.
I am scared.
I am mean.
I speak out of place.
When I am outside,
I feel as if there is a sign on my forehead;
Which reads, ‘Big Disgrace.’
I can’t smell.
I can’t taste.
It makes it hard for me to eat.
Oh, I could go on and on.
What’s the point?
I may as well claim defeat.
Just FIX ME!!
Don’t you hear what I say?
Do it now!
Do it while I’m here!
Do it today!
I have nowhere to go.
I just want to be fixed.
So all this pain can just ‘go’.
I feel your pain.
I still am a part of you.
Together we shall work through all of this.
I know there are a lot of things together, we both can do.
Place your heart inside my brain.
You will begin to feel less weak;
Less sadness, less pain.
This is now how we begin;
To mend a broken heart.
From here, we continue, a brand new start.
The road will be long.
There will be bumps along the way.
However, working together, we will not slide astray.
You are my true friend.
You have been since we were born.
We will stand in unison.
We shall not be scorned.
I shall trust you then;
As for now, you are truly, the only friend I have.
I like the way you think.
I almost feel as if I would like to laugh.
Roseanne says she wrote this poem because, “It makes me reflect on how far and how many things I have accomplished along on my journey.”